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We analyzed over 500,000 first contacts on our dating site, Ok Cupid.Our program looked at keywords and phrases, how they affected reply rates, and what trends were statistically significant.Getting back to the UK and taking stock, I realised my circle of single friends had dwindled as I'd got older, and I didn't want to date someone at work, as that's always struck me as complicated and potentially disastrous.I outlined my dilemma to my boss and she suggested I try online dating.That's not to say all the mainstream dating sites were bad and all the strange ones were good – if people ask, I always say mainstream dating site My Single Friend (where your mates write your profile) is the best one I tried, simply because it makes dating more fun to have someone to share it with and writing the profile less onerous.It can get a bit much at times – I found I was spending about three hours a week writing messages and then going on two or three dates a week for six months. " The most common story I hear about online dating is: "I went on about a dozen dates, met one total weirdo, 10 people who were nice enough but there was no romance and then I met my husband/wife/boyfriend." That matched up to my own – for every woman I met that I never wanted to see again, I met another I wanted to stay friends with, even if there was no romantic spark.She'd met her husband through it and assured me I'd be an absolute stud online, as I'm charming and normal, as opposed to most of the men on mainstream dating sites."Online dating is great for people like you, Willard – it's like we've finally invented a pair of tight jeans for being funny, or a push-up bra for being intelligent," she said.

So, in short, it’s okay to laugh, but keep the rest of your message grammatical and punctuated.

I simultaneously wanted dates that were amusing enough to blog about, but I also wanted a real chance of meeting the future Mrs Foxton.

Then I hit upon an idea; why not do a multitude of different dating sites? I figured I could get my amusing dates from the madder sites – such as Biker Dating, Sea Captain dating or Godmother (which matches royals with commoners).

I never really meant to start internet dating, but after a long-term relationship left me single aged 32, I didn't really feel like I had a choice.

My break-up was a bit nightmarish – the girl was due to be the bridesmaid at our friend's all-American, taffeta ballgowns-and-doves-style wedding – you know, the kind of weddings they have at the end of American romcoms – and she failed to show.

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